Well, yesterday was the day. The day that I had a five percent chance of meeting this little boy blessing who’s been residing within my body for the last 38 weeks. May 11. The day that’s been on the calendar and that’s been the topic of many conversations over the last half year.
I’m not frustrated that I didn’t get to meet him yesterday. Perhaps it’s the part of me that’s naturally patient. But even more than that, I feel like it’s the knowledge and trust I have in the God of all. The Lord of life itself, who challenged me over a year ago to relinquish my desire to control my family to him, has a plan for when this baby needs to be born. He will make it happen in his right time. And I am very satisfied to rest in that.
People are telling me that I’m “dropping” or that I look like it could happen at any time. That’s how I feel, but I also know from experience that people don’t really know what they’re talking about when it comes to gauging a pregnant lady’s “term.” I like how my doctor put it: her crystal ball is fuzzy.
There’s just no way to know when a baby will be born, which in and of itself is a beautiful exercise in trust and patience. Perhaps God has each momma go through this exercise (multiple times for some of us) to give us a little practice in this trust and patience. There’s no doubt that as these little babies grow up into toddlers and young kids and old kids and grown kids that we continually must walk this line of trust and patience.
We trust that God knows what’s best and has perfect timing in every circumstance. We trust that we are doing all we can as moms to aid the development of our children and provide for their safety and well-being.
We are patient (or if we’re not, we drive ourselves crazy with disappointment) for our children to reach each new milestone, to develop in ways that are good and pleasing, to make mature choices, to attain the ideals that we have set before them. And there is even more patience required when they do not even follow the path we desire for them, when they become who they are rather than who we want them to be.
Perhaps I will forever be "practicing" this lesson.